Proverbs 28:23

He who rebukes a person will afterward find more favor than he who flatters with the tongue. (NASB)

One of the unwritten “commandments” of our society today seems to be “Thou shalt not offend anyone.” The main principle behind it is reasonable, i.e., do not deliberately offend others out of spite or malice. But like many things in our society this basic principle has morphed into other unspoken, but powerful mindsets that guide our interaction with others. Mainly:

Do not hurt someone’s feelings, even at the expense of the truth

This has bad consequences for everyone involved. This leads to:

• Agreeing with unwise or sinful thinking or actions
• Being silent about a subject and ignoring something that should be addressed
• Telling them what they want to hear, or allowing them to do what they want to do even though it could bring on adverse consequences. (This has long term detrimental effects for children)
• You becoming fearful or reluctant to engage in any conversation that leads to conflict

For the person you care about:

• They become used “being right” all the time and cannot accept a different opinion
• They interpret disagreement as a personal rejection and react accordingly
• They become less “teachable” and unwilling to listen to sound advice
• They revert back to more of a “childish” mindset instead of maturity in certain areas
• They follow the “flesh” more than godly wisdom

This can easily lead to chaos, heartache, disfunction and foolish (unwise) behaviors in our society, relationships and our personal lives. Jesus, the Spirit of Truth and Wisdom of God, never shied away from correcting someone. He always told others the truth…but He did it in love, at the right time, in the right way, under the right circumstances, with the purpose of building godly character for the glory of our Father.

If someone you love needs correction, do it…after seeking the Lord on how, when, where, what and why. You, in your correction, are to reflect the love and character of Christ, so you can build the love and character of Christ in others.